What are the 7 Most Common Signs of Exam Stress?
‘Tis the Season for Spring, and also Exam Nerves…
Hurray - the sun is shining, the skies are blue, and it feels like Spring is officially in the air! And with it, I can see, sense, and hear, the arrival of exam anxiety as nerves begin to hit in, and emotions start to run high.
Just as the buds are appearing and the flowers are beginning to grow, so too are the signs and symptoms of exam anxiety.
I start to see it in the students and parents that I work with, and also from the comments I hear from teachers about the growing number of students who are needing special consideration for exams, and requesting not to be in the exam hall with the main cohort.
When managed well, this time can be an extremely positive one for students, as it teaches a great deal about resilience and also builds confidence and courage, for the next time. It is important to remember too, that exam nerves are very normal, and good for helping students maintain sharp focus, and alertness, during exams.
Having spent eleven years living with 50+ teenagers going through major exams each year, (in my previous role as a Houseparent in three different boarding schools), I’ve learnt a considerable amount about how we - as educators and parents - can best support students to create a healthy and balanced revision environment, and to empower them to feel calm and confident during this time. The direct result of feeling calm and in control, is that students then go on to achieve their true potential and top results, and feel assured that they can handle pressurised situations. Of course, this is the ideal scenario, however I’ve also observed what hinders progress, and so I share with you here my key findings, in the hope that this helps you, and the teens you live or work with, to feel supported during this challenging stage:
What are the signs that you need to look out for, to ensure that your teen student stays on the healthy side of managing their anxiety levels?
7 Key Signs to Look Out for:
Struggle to Focus
Change in Personality
Extreme Procrastination
Strong Emotional Responses
Decrease in Work Ability
Unwillingness to Communicate
Lack of Quality Sleep
Most students will experience one or more of these symptoms during the run-up to exams as their minds become busier with trying to remember vast amounts of information, having to timetable everything they need to do in detail, and cope with all the other day-to-day life events. It’s not surprising, therefore, that the need for balance in their lives at this time becomes even more essential.
It’s also vital to remember what’s typical behaviour for your teen - the most important sign of concern is a significant change in their normal behaviour, as some of these traits are everyday habits for teens - so notice what seems different to you, or which areas of concern are being raised by their teachers, and then ask your teen in which areas they are struggling the most.
The next key question is: How can you help them, as their Parent or Teacher, to feel calm, confident, and in control during this potentially stressful time?
In my experience, the answers lie in adopting a flexible approach and ideally combining aspects from the worlds of both coaching and wellbeing, in order to create the best all-round balanced working environment. Here are a few simple strategies you can adopt and implement right away:
5 Ways to Help Your Teen(s) Cope with Exam Anxiety:
Ask, don’t tell.
Adopt a coaching approach and ask them open questions. Refrain from trying to tell / suggest / teach them the best thing to do, but help them find what works best for them.
2. Co-create a productive home/work environment
Ask your teen what they need to create their best working environment - what helps and what hinders progress? Keep asking questions until you have built up a clear picture of what they can take accountability for, and what you can do to actively support them. (NB. From experience of having lived with many teenagers as a Houseparent, don’t let them negate all responsibility for helping at home - this only serves to make their world more inward-focused, and that is not a good thing at this time!).
Ensure Relaxation Time Takes Place
Do whatever you can to ensure that when they are not working, they are purposely relaxing. This is vital for allowing their brains to digest the material they have been studying and to allow their bodies to recalibrate the stress hormones that may be circulating during moments of tension or sharp focus.
Have a “No-Exams” Discussion Policy
Create an agreement about when, and where, are good times and places to discuss exams, and where are “safe zones”. This has been a game-changer for some students I’ve worked with, to know that other people - whether friends, siblings, parents or teachers - won’t be discussing exams before or after, and where they can find a calm and quiet space away from all feelings of pressure.
Offer Help in the Form of Chats, and Resources to Help Relieve Anxiety
Let your teen know that you are there for them whenever they need to chat, and will offer a non-judgemental sounding board. Often, last thing at night is one of the most common times for teens to open up, so be alert to that potentiality and don’t shy away from asking how they’re feeling at that time. The chance is, they will sleep better for having shared their feelings, rather than struggled with sleep as they’re overwhelmed by strong emotions.
Lastly, be a guide and source of knowledge for them, so as and when they do approach you for help on one of the seven key concerns above, or even a different one, you’re ready and equipped with tools, techniques and tips. These resources can range from suggestions of sleep aids and relaxation techniques, to meditation apps and coaching mindset tools.
